Thursday, 9 August 2012

When it's okay to fight

This morning, I sat behind my laptop with undefined feelings. I know I am not too excited, yet I am not sad, I am not angry but I am not in great moods, I can't place my hands on the kind of emotions running in my veins right now. I have shifted between crying and laughing in the last few minutes, my friend at work has made me laugh, made me shout and eventually left me to my own; he has not been able to get me back into my normal warm state.

I have a sister whose JD or bio should have been something like "thinking for a living". You can't be her friend and not know how to think, she thinks through everything, even her feelings. So with this drama going on in my life, I have decided to step into her shoes and think through these emotions. Why am I feeling this way?Is anything possibly wrong with me? What triggered these feelings? Am I just working myself up into frenzy? Questions and many more questions..... I concluded I am tired, kind of tired of my status quo, a bit restless too...something in me wants to break loose.

A man once told his first child "you are going to be subordinate to your younger brother but when you decide to be free you will break lose". That simply tells me its okay to fight! Nothing happens on this side of eternity until force is applied. I won't sit down and sing "it is well, it is well" (you know that song, right?) and let this feelings pass. I had felt like this in quick successions in recent times and yours sincerely was quick to sing that song, now it seems I settled myself into a state of inertia.

Now don't get me wrong, I am grateful for how far I have come, what do I have that I have not recieved? What could my arms have achieved without divine help? But there is a place for more, the mountain heights, a place where eagles fly; my friend calls it "there".

The beautiful butterfly itself wriggles out its cocoon, why should you not wriggle for freedom when restless? Doctors say pain is your friend, it simply tells you something is not right somewhere, so I won't play christainese with this feeling on my inside, I will ensure it spurs me to fight, good things don't come the way of men who wait for it but for men who seek good things or even fight for it.  

This good fight is relative, one might need to fight for her home, another might need to fight for his kids getting lost out there, another one's fight could be breaking free from corporate slavery like Jimi Tewe calls it, for me , it's a big fight to expression, getting out of a cocoon. This is when it’s okay to fight.

You identify where and what you have to fight or fight for, you may be like a butterfly, under the right conditions you could break out seemingly smoothly on your own or like the chick, you need a mother hen to brood over you or the right machinery, or better still a child, coming with so much drama, pains and aches but worth the hassles.

Fight when life throws dirt your way, fight when life wants to turn you into a prey (here, you are either a prey or a predator), fight for anything that is rightfully yours, fight for expression of your inner self, fight to be you, don’t be any man’s shadow but of God. Fight, just fight!


  1. Fight! Fight! Fight! And the biggest fight of all is the one we must fight with ourselves daily. Sometimes, I find my greatest enemy is within. In my head.

    1. Thanks for passing by here ma, I'm still here fighting hard DAILY!